Anger Management is God's Business
Have you noticed that when you’re angry, people tend to run away from you? You end up sitting on an island by yourself. God doesn’t even want to be near you. That’s not where you want to be. Leave anger to God for His righteous judgment. For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. (James 1:20)
Remember in the Old Testament when the Israelites were dying of thirst, and they complained to Moses that they were thirsty? God told Moses to strike the rock and water would come out. Sure enough. Water came out, and the Israelites quenched their thirst. Then it happened again. This time God told Moses to speak to the rock and water would come out. But Moses was angry with the people and he hit the rock twice. Water came out again, and the Israelites drank. But God was angry at Moses for being angry and disobeying Him. The consequences of that were severe.
And the LORD spake unto Moses and Aaron, Because ye believed me not, to sanctify me in the eyes of the children of Israel, therefore ye shall not bring this congregation into the land which I have given them. (Num. 20:12) Moses, who was put on this earth to lead the Israelites into the promised land, didn’t get to enter the promised land himself because of his anger and resulting disobedience. Surely that was depressing.
Anger takes a matter into its own hands and executes a verbal or physical punishment. The toll it takes on the other person is one thing, but the consequences to your own life are another.
Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: (Eph. 4:26) Learn to zip your lip. Give your flash fire or slow burn to God. He’s the one in control of whatever it is anyway. Let Him deal with the person or circumstance. Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. (James 1:19-20) Only God works the righteousness of God.
Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. (Rom. 12:19)
It’s for your own good. Your emotional well-being depends on your ability to turn grievances over to the Lord.
God Understands Loneliness
No doubt, one of the most widespread causes of depression is loneliness. It can easily and quickly lead you to the emotional abyss. If you have ever experienced loneliness—caused by being alone more than you would prefer—I don’t even need to describe its depths, and you don’t need to be reminded.
The feeling of loneliness is not a sin that needs to be repented of. The first time the word alone is used in the Bible is Genesis 2:18 when God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone.” Thus He created a spouse for Adam.
I know what loneliness is and the depression it leads to. I was single until age 39, and not because I wanted to be single. Depression was almost unavoidable, but I always knew in my heart God understood and He wouldn’t leave me like that forever. I completely got the verses that say, Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up. Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone? And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken. (Ecc. 4:9-12)
If loneliness leads you to the depths of despair, understand that God is there. He understands. Remember when Jesus was left alone to face His darkest hour? Everyone turned away from Him, and He had to face the cross alone. He was more alone than anyone has ever been. You know the anguish He experienced wasn’t entirely the physical pain of the cross. No. Remember what He cried out on the cross? “My God, My God. Why has thou forsaken me?” Forsaken means abandoned or deserted. He was left alone—by God! He died of a broken heart, and maybe not solely for us, but also for the experience of being abandoned while He took on the sins of the world and God turned away.
But he rose again. And now He’s alive in heaven sitting at the right hand of God making intercession for you. For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. (Hebrews 4:15)
You can and should pray to Him and ask for relief. One of the things He has ordained that should help with loneliness is the body of Christ—the church.
You may say that you don’t need church. You can worship God alone in your house or out in nature. Yes, you can, and you should. But you do need the church, because He gave spiritual gifts to His children, and when Christians all gather together in church exercising their gifts, they are like Christ and all He was. You need that. And the body of Christ needs you. Some in the body have the gift of exhortation, and you need to be around these kinds of people, just as they need the gifts you have, if you know Jesus as Savior. Everybody needs the body, not just you.
Loneliness is an emotional weakness, but not a sin. Ask God’s help while you are weak.
Consider Paul’s thorn in the flesh. God didn’t take it away, but He taught Paul, Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong. (2 Cor. 12:10)
Loneliness is not comfortable, but God provides respites when you pray and ask. His strength can come out when you are weak. Ask Him for strength and relief today.
Accept God's Purposes
Nothing that happens in your life is out of God’s control. Do you believe that? If that’s the case, why do bad things happen to people trying to live for the Lord? Everyone has probably asked that question when faced squarely with a tragedy. That question comes in so many forms. Why would God create a person, and then allow them to go through unbearable suffering?
Job, who suffered as much as anyone, tried not to ask those questions, but those around him did, forcing him to engage in speculation. Was Job depressed? Yes, he was. But we know that God was near and was in control, and He was not impressed with Job’s friends’ theories.
The bottom line is, God has His reasons. We don’t understand, but He is sovereign.
In the end, after God finally spoke to Job, Job answered the LORD, and said, I know that thou canst do every thing, and that no thought can be withholden from thee. Who is he that hideth counsel without knowledge? therefore have I uttered that I understood not; things too wonderful for me, which I knew not. …I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee. Wherefore I abhor myself, and repent in dust and ashes. (Job 42:1-6)
After the awesome God spoke to him, Job must have realized that he was merely a dot on a map and calendar. Who was he to question and figure out the God who transcends time and space?
Then, God had some words for Job’s friends, who supposed they had divine insight into why all the bad things had happened to him.
The LORD said to Eliphaz the Temanite, My wrath is kindled against thee, and against thy two friends: for ye have not spoken of me the thing that is right, as my servant Job hath. (Job 42:7)
What was the right thing Job had spoken? Paraphrased, he said “God, you can do whatever you want, and no one can stop you. I talked about things I didn’t understand. I see you now, and I am despicable in comparison. I repent.”
You can’t know why tragedy and suffering happens. Try not to theorize on the human plane when you find yourself having to muddle through disaster and heartbreak.
Instead, hang on to God, who uses people and circumstances to accomplish His bigger, unknown-to-us eternal plans.
To remain sober minded, think on these verses:
For by him were all things created, that are in heaven, and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones, or dominions, or principalities, or powers: all things were created by him, and for him: And he is before all things, and by him all things consist. (Col. 1:16-17)
The LORD hath made all things for himself: yea, even the wicked for the day of evil. (Prov. 16:4)
For of him, and through him, and to him, are all things: to whom be glory for ever. Amen. (Rom. 11:36)
Learn What You Are Here For
One of the poisons of the heart is selfishness. We were born as “me-monsters.” We learned as babies how to get attention and secure whatever we want to make us comfortable. It’s something we don’t automatically unlearn. We grow up thinking that life is about pleasure. That means we must always be comfortable, happy and fulfilled. Isn’t that what we want for our children? Wouldn’t that be what God wants for you?
Actually, life is about God’s pleasure. Oh yeah. I forgot. Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honour and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created. (Rev. 4:11)
You weren’t created for yourself. Your life will turn around when you see God as the center of the universe, not you, and you begin making decisions and plans around God’s pleasure and not your own. As you grow in spiritual maturity from reading your Bible each day and praying, you will grasp all that this means.
But for now, realize that selfishness is living life as a practical atheist. God is not in all your thoughts. You are in all your thoughts. Selfishness manifests itself in unthankfulness. Don’t wait for Thanksgiving to be thankful. Make praise a daily priority.
To get started, you may want to have a journal or a page on your computer to go to each day and write five things you are thankful for, and consciously thank God. At first, you will likely thank God for the things around you that make you comfortable—your family, your job, your health, food on the table, etc. But then, branch out into marvelous aspects of God.
Look at Psalm 103 for inspiration. David praises God for forgiveness of sins; for God’s lovingkindness and tender mercies; for good things to eat; that God is slow to anger; and for God’s righteousness.
Turn your eyes upward. Look out the window and notice how faithful God is in causing the sun to rise each day and set each evening. He does it without fail. He gives the birds and squirrels food to eat every day, for His pleasure. He made sea creatures in the ocean depths that no man has ever seen, for His pleasure.
But He made you as part of the highest form of earthly intelligence to praise, honor and serve Him. That’s your purpose. How did He make you to do that? That is for you to discover. What can you do to bring Him glory? Ask Him. Start on a new adventure of selflessness with an aim to be an instrument to bring glory to God, verbally and with your life.
Learn the Power of Your Thoughts and God’s Words
There is one thing above all else that has the potential to jerk you around from the moment you wake up in the morning to the time you fall asleep at night. Your mind with all its thoughts and imaginations takes you on a trip every day, in fact many trips. It takes you on guilt trips and to pity parties and doubt fests. Your mind and imaginations can drive you to fits of anger and jealousy and then stop you cold with fear. There is no limit to the places you can go each day. But, truth be told, your mind probably takes you down the same path every day with only a few side excursions. You might be more prone to wandering along with low-grade anger and suspicion or doubt and fear.
Don’t let those imaginations take the steering wheel and accelerator pedal of your day. Learn to use your brake pedal and catch yourself before you turn down the path of feeling sorry for yourself, doubting God and thinking everyone should fall in step with your ideas and plans. In fact, just stop and park for a minute. What does God say?
Over and over He tells us to be sober with our minds. That means self-controlled and temperate. Take yourself in hand and direct your thoughts rather than listen to your thoughts. You may have heard the old phrase “an idle mind is the devil’s workshop.” It’s not in the Bible, but it is certainly true. Unless you consciously control your thoughts, Satan will be there with his suggestions. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist stedfast in the faith. (1 Pet. 5:8-9a)
Hopefully, this isn’t all new to you, and you’ve already developed the habit of 2 Cor. 10:5 Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.
That is the key to preventing depression. You just don’t allow yourself to dwell on the random thoughts that rise up all day. Instead, you replace them with true thoughts. (The list of approved thoughts is in Phil. 4:8.) The best place to find true thoughts is the Bible, of course. But there’s even more to God’s words than stagnant thoughts and truth. It turns out, the Bible isn’t passively true. For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. (Heb 4:12)
So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. (Isa. 55:11)
Is not my word like as a fire? saith the LORD; and like a hammer that breaketh the rock in pieces? (Jer. 23:29)
The Bible is the place to go for a transformed mind. That means writing appropriate verses on 3x5 cards and reviewing them when those stealth thoughts enter your head. Figure out what the common thoughts are that drag you down every time, then find verses to combat them and review them often. Make those drunken thoughts flee at God’s word. Remember the offensive weapon in your arsenal is supposed to be the Word of God. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: (Eph. 6:17)
God knows your thoughts, and He wants you to replace them with His word. Not just His thoughts, but His very words. There’s power in God’s very words. Start memorizing.
View Unfulfilled Expectations in a New Light
You worked hard for a promotion at work, and someone else got it. Or, you thought you’d be married by now, but there are no prospects in sight. Maybe you have a sickness or infirmity that immobilizes you or infertility prevents your dream of your own family.
Each of these are disappointing circumstances, at a minimum. It would be easy to think, “Why do these things always happen to me?” You look at others who appear less deserving, and marvel at how easily they move forward unhindered.
You, of all people, understand the verse: Hope deferred maketh the heart sick. (Prov. 13:12a) That word deferred means “drag along.” You can relate.
Part of unfulfilled expectations is the downward spiral that easily goes with it. You doubt that God cares and you fear your life will always be like this. You can’t get past “why?”
But the truth is that God has not disappeared. He is still sovereign, and He has His plans and purposes. It might encourage you to know that some of the most used-of-God people in the Bible had unfulfilled expectations. We’ll look at one.
The Apostle Paul was the first great missionary, and he had a crying need that he begged God to fulfill. Remember that thorn in the flesh?
And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure. For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me. And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong. (2 Cor. 12:7-10)
Paul received the “why” of his circumstance. It was so that he wouldn’t get too proud. It was a Satan-induced, God-prescribed infirmity to keep him humble. God knows what you would become if you received what you really want. He also knows what you can become if you don’t receive what you want. What God desires is that His strength be made perfect in your weakness. Let God shine. Like John said, “He must increase, but I must decrease.” (John 3:30) Paul certainly got that. He got it so well, he was excited to have his physical ailment so God could become strong in his weakness.
Paul’s experience is also a model of And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. (Rom. 8:28) Even though Paul’s thorn in the flesh was the messenger of Satan, God used it. Again, God is sovereign. He’s in control, and He can work with and through anything for His purposes.
Read through Paul’s account of his thorn in the flesh again and ask God to show you what He wants you to learn, and ask Him to allow the lesson to stick and help you through your challenges.
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. (Jer. 29:11)
My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. (Ps. 62:5)
Self-doubt is No Problem to God
“I don’t doubt God, I just doubt myself.” Have you ever had that thought? God is great, but you’re not sure you can live up to the expectations required to be right with Him. You know you’ll fall, because you have so many times before. Down in the dumps you go.
In this case, let’s fight failure with failure. By that I mean, don’t think too highly of yourself. Reduce your self-expectations. For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly. (Rom. 12:3a)
Soberly means moderately. You’re not that good, and you’re not that bad. You are clay. Truly. You were taken from the dust, and to the dust you will go. But for the grace of God, that’s about all.
The fact that you don’t think too highly of your abilities to stay right with God is better than being proud of the abilities you do have. Seest thou a man wise in his own conceit? there is more hope of a fool than of him. (Prov. 26:12)
If nothing else, this book will teach you that being down on yourself is the first step in looking up to a great big God who loves to lift up people like you. If you are doubting yourself, you are half way to being on top of the mountain. But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. (James 4:6 AV)
The difference is, you need to take your focus off your inabilities and turn it to God, who will catch you when you fall. He forgives. He moves on. Move on with Him.
Resist the temptation to go deep within yourself to “figure yourself out.” A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself. (Prov. 18:2)
What you need to know is, yes, you will likely fail. Even the apostle Paul grappled with that. He knew the right thing to do, but he found something inside that didn’t want to do it. Instead, he found himself doing the very thing he knew was wrong. That bugged him. (Read Rom. 7)
Here’s Paul’s conclusion about his failings: There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death. (Rom. 8:1-2)
Your goal now is not to discover and trust your heart, but to discover and trust God’s. Lay down your self-expectations and follow after God.
Remember, the sparky things you do to lift yourself up amounts to “bodily exercise,” which profits little. But godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come. (1 Tim 4:8) The only work you need to do is work on your communication with God. Start listening to Him in His word, and start talking to Him in prayer.
The Big Challenge
I would guess that the single biggest cause of depression for Christians is a small, seeming innocuous condition called doubt. Why would I say that? What makes doubt so lethal?
Doubt is a shield. Only instead of a shield to ward off the enemy’s arrows, it’s a shield to protect yourself from God’s grace, which is activated by faith. Why would you do that?
You know, God can do anything, but He chooses not to when you doubt. You end up flailing around and eventually calling out to Him… more because you’re in trouble than because you believe.
Remember when Peter saw Jesus walking on the water and had a sudden impulse to walk on water himself? Jesus encouraged him, and he jumped out of the boat and walked on water, until he looked around at the wind and waves and was afraid and started to sink. And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt? (Matt. 14:31)
Jesus had more to say about doubt, in relation to faith: Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done. (Matt. 21:21)
You may not be looking to move any mountains today. You would settle for a little peace and some hope. Fortunately, there’s a remedy for doubt. It’s called faith. Believe God. Work on holding up that shield of faith to ward off the darts of the devil. By the way, his darts are aimed at your mind. Satan’s tactic is to whisper in your ear, “God didn’t really mean that.” That’s what he did to Eve. (Read Gen. 3:1-4.) He planted doubt in her mind.
What if Eve would have held up the shield of faith—talked about in Eph 6:16? She wouldn’t have sinned, sending us all on the same path she took, doubting what God said and doubting that God meant what He said.
The key for you in getting over this malady is to find what God said that applies to your heart and your situation and believe it. Find a promise today. The Bible is full of them. Maybe you could start with this one. And seek not ye what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, neither be ye of doubtful mind. For all these things do the nations of the world seek after: and your Father knoweth that ye have need of these things. (Luke 12:29-30)
Find God’s promise and pray it back, asking Him to make it true on your behalf today, and tell Him you believe. I promise, it will lift your spirits.
One Trip You Don’t Want to Take
If you’re like me, when you go on a trip, you have to find a keepsake to bring back to spark infinite memories. I have a little table that’s like a time capsule of most of my trips. It holds turtles and memories from everywhere… Singapore, Hawaii, Chile, Springfield, Mo., India, California, etc.
But there’s one trip you don’t want to go on, and if you do, you don’t want souvenirs: a guilt trip. You don’t want a regular remembrance of what you’ve done, because it causes anxiety, feelings of unworthiness, imaginations of being forsaken by God and others, unrelenting disappointment in yourself, ongoing shame and more.
If you don’t learn what to do with that heavy load, you’ll go under for days, and maybe weeks to a lifetime.
Maybe you bear the physical or emotional scars from a choice you made years ago that prevents you from forgetting what you did, and you’re tormented by the memories and the turmoil. You’ve asked yourself if God can forgive, and even though you know mentally that He did forgive you when you asked, you feel like you don’t deserve any more special favors from God. You haven’t forgiven yourself, and deep down, you don’t truly believe that God has either. You imagine it comes up in God’s mind as it does in your mind.
If that’s the cause of your despair, there is hope. But it will require reprogramming your mind. It will also require taking yourself in hand, and rather than listening to yourself, you will need to begin talking to yourself. It will be a process at first, but eventually, you will be delivered.
First of all, what you think is unforgiveable is only a blip on God’s radar. Think of the worst thing you could do. I think that would be murder. Were there any murderers in the Bible, and what was the aftermath of their murder? Did God wash His hands of them?
Consider Moses. And he looked this way and that way, and when he saw that there was no man, he slew the Egyptian, and hid him in the sand. (Ex. 2:12) He murdered someone. Even that did not disqualify him from a life filled with God’s close presence. It was after that that God called Moses from the burning bush and made him a leader. It was after that when Moses was called God’s friend. And there arose not a prophet since in Israel like unto Moses, whom the LORD knew face to face. (Deut. 34:10) It may have been that very murder that made Moses a meek man. (Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth.) Num. 12:3 That word meek means poor, weak and afflicted. I’m sure the memory of that murder never left his mind. But rather than disqualify him, it put him in a condition in which God could use him. Because God gives grace to the humble, contrite person.
If you can just look upward rather than look inward, you will find grace, favor and even peace—maybe for the first time. Who is among you that feareth the LORD, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the LORD, and stay upon his God. (Isa. 50:10) Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. (Isa. 26:3)
Trusting God is a process, just like building a new friendship. You don’t trust someone that you don’t know well until that person proves trustworthy. As you see that God is trustworthy, and that He still answers prayer and provides blessings aplenty, in spite of you, you will grow in trust. Eventually, you will leave the guilt behind.
Feeling Emotionally Lame?
Remember in the Bible, after David’s best friend Jonathan was killed in battle, David went looking for any family member of Jonathan’s that he could find in order to show kindness to him? (If you’re not familiar with the reason why he did it, read 1 Sam. 20:11-15.) After searching for a family member, David discovered that Jonathan had a son named Mephibosheth who was “lame in both feet.” David asked someone to go fetch Mephibosheth, and with fear and trembling, the poor guy was brought to David. And David said unto him, Fear not: for I will surely shew thee kindness for Jonathan thy father's sake, and will restore thee all the land of Saul thy father; and thou shalt eat bread at my table continually. (2 Sam. 9:7)
Through no mustering of his own genius, Mephibosheth got to live off of the king’s favor from then on.
You know what’s interesting? That term describing Mephibosheth, lame in both feet, is translated contrite in other places.
David is a type of Jesus Christ in many ways. And here he showed kindness and favor to a contrite person. Contrite means crushed, collapsed, broken, dust. That pretty much describes Mephibosheth, and maybe it describes you sometimes. But now read what God thinks of crushed, collapsed, broken people who feel like dust.
The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. (Ps. 34:18)
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. (Ps. 51:17)
For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones. (Isa. 57:15)
For all those things hath mine hand made, and all those things have been, saith the LORD: but to this man will I look, even to him that is poor and of a contrite spirit, and trembleth at my word. (Isa. 66:2)
Like David looking for someone to show kindness to, God looks for someone to show kindness to, and wouldn’t you know, He chooses the same kind of person David chose. Contrite, broken, humble and crushed.
If you are prone to depression, those verses would be good ones to print out on a card and hang around the house. God is for you! Everyone should be as contrite so they can experience God’s attention, presence and reviving.
Here, pray David’s prayer: I am feeble and sore broken: I have roared by reason of the disquietness of my heart. (Ps. 38:8) Sore broken means contrite. Call out to God. He is listening and ready to come alongside and revive you.
Get Low to Get Up
It’s the humble person God is looking for. The humble is who He exalts. If you generally feel down, you are close to the right position before God. The problem is, most who feel crushed, weak and emotionally helpless turn their focus inward rather than call out to God. If that’s you, remember you are a silver goblet in the making, and the dross that needs to be skimmed off is that tendency to writhe in emotional anguish with no thought of God. He’s right there with you. Call out to Him.
How does a person become humble, by the way. Humble means to lower yourself, to reduce yourself to a plain. You do it through submitting to God and to others. While humility is a standing (or lowering) within yourself, submission is a standing (or lowering) to God and others. Humble and submit are similar, aren’t they? You might be humble in heart, but to submit, there’s someone outside you that you are lowering yourself before. Consider this: Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble. Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time. (1 Pet. 5:5-6)
You let others be more important than you. You let them go first. You put yourself last. I know, it’s not natural. Submission isn’t a quality you pray for. It’s something you willingly, consciously do. Look at the verbs in the above verses. Submit yourselves… be subject one to another… be clothed with humility… Humble yourselves.
The best example I can think of is Jesus, God made flesh. He came from the most exalted position to live among us. And he didn’t come to be ministered to, but to minister (Mark 10:45). He humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death (Phil. 2:8). He came from as high as you can come to go as low as you can go. And he did it consciously… willingly. Just how was He able to do that? Here’s how: Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously. (1 Pet. 2:23) He didn’t stand up for Himself. He didn’t say, “Hey, do you know who my Father is?” He said nothing. Instead, He put Himself in God’s hands. And that’s what you do when you submit to God and humble yourself. You commit yourself to God, not just once in your life, but daily. Maybe hourly.
So, here’s the point for today. When you feel crushed, weak, beaten down and emotionally helpless, submit to God. For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. (Heb. 4:15-16)
To look around is to be distressed. To look within is to be depressed. To look up is to be blessed.
Go Lower to Get Higher
The idea of being humble might sound good, if you’re living in a cave with only bats to keep you company. But some people live highly visible lives, interacting with people at work and socially. Perhaps you’re a leader at church. If you go around acting humble and meek, you’ll get stomped on as others in your sphere pass you up. There are some pretty strong personalities out there that will gladly kick you out of the way on their way up.
The world will teach you how to be assertive, if not by seminar, at least by example. I’ve had a job where I just went about minding my own business and another made it known she wanted my job—or pieces of my job.
By personality, you might not be the type to stand up for yourself, so you think you’re doomed to be at the bottom, overlooked by everyone. Once again, you find yourself alone in the abyss, envying those with stronger personalities who know how to get what they want.
But here’s a secret. The benefit of being humble, meek and entrusting yourself to God is that He lifts you up. You don’t do it yourself, He does it.
For whosoever exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. (Luke 14:11)
A man's pride shall bring him low: but honour shall uphold the humble in spirit. Pro 29:23
When men are cast down, then thou shalt say, There is lifting up; and he shall save the humble person. (Job 22:29)
Remember, God doesn’t think like we think. His ways aren’t our ways, and His thoughts aren’t our thoughts. Yes, the world says to claw and fight your way into prominence, but God says to lower yourself a few notches and let Him lift you up. This next passage is profound, and you may see things in it you have never seen. Read carefully:
But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded. Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up. (James 4:6-10)
Doesn’t it sound a little like God is telling you to be depressed in order to humble yourself so He can lift you up? (Look back at my Sparky People blog.) He says to be afflicted. That means to feel miserable. He says to turn your joy to heaviness. That means dejection and gloom. Hmm. You might feel like you’re already there. So look at the benefit of that if you will turn your focus to Him. Praise Him. Say, “Thank you Jesus. Please lift me up right now, because I have no strength in myself.” It will be easier for Him to lift you up if you will at least look up! You don’t have to look around at others. You don’t have to look inside at what a wretch you feel like. Just look up from your misery, dejection and gloom and take hold of God. He will lift you up! Then you’re better off than those stronger personalities that lift themselves up.
What's the Big Deal With Being Humble?
The kind of heart God can work with is the lowly and humble heart. We’ll call those the pliable people. God loves them. He expects people to be pliable in His hands, and it only comes with humility and submission to Him.
A humble heart is one that is closer to the earth…a little more desperate and needy. I know, it’s not the way we think we should live. We think we should be on top of the world. But when a person is self-sufficient and self-relying, they don’t need or acknowledge God, and as I’ve said before, our parents raised us to be independent, but God is raising us to be dependent, on Him. And so we’re back to the humble heart.
Often the first time a word is mentioned in the Bible sets the tone for its meaning throughout the Bible. The first time humble is mentioned, it’s a message for the wicked Pharaoh who is holding the Israelites captive in Egypt, refusing to let them go, and making their life miserable. God chooses His spokesmen, Moses and Aaron: And Moses and Aaron came in unto Pharaoh, and said unto him, Thus saith the LORD God of the Hebrews, How long wilt thou refuse to humble thyself before me? let my people go, that they may serve me. (Exodus 10:3)
Humble before God is the point. It means afflict and oppress. And all through the Bible, God wants people to be humble before Him. It only happens when we’re brought low, crushed and needy. Why does He want us humble? So we’ll be obedient to Him. Pharaoh wasn’t obedient in letting God’s people go because he wasn’t humble.
The humble/obedience connection is underscored the next time the word humble is used in the Bible. It’s in Deuteronomy, and it’s after the Israelites have been free, but wandering in the wilderness for 40 years. And thou shalt remember all the way which the LORD thy God led thee these forty years in the wilderness, to humble thee, and to prove thee, to know what was in thine heart, whether thou wouldest keep his commandments, or no. (Deut. 8:2)
If the idea of being humble is just about afflicting us, that’s a little hard to understand. But look at the third time the word is used. Who fed thee in the wilderness with manna, which thy fathers knew not, that he might humble thee, and that he might prove thee, to do thee good at thy latter end; (Deut 8:16)
The New Testament supports God’s ultimate goodness resulting from our humility. Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: (1 Pet. 5:6)
So, if you are being crushed, afflicted and oppressed—depressed, ask God what He wants to teach you and how you can grow through this. Tell Him you know this isn’t for naught. Submit to whatever it is He has for you.
Look Forward or Look Up
If you have spent many days down in the dumps, disinterested in everyone and everything around you, unmotivated to get out of bed and all that goes with that emotional spiral, then you truly know what suffering is. It is a desperate, hopeless prospect.
If that’s you, sit up for just a moment. There have been others who suffered emotionally. Maybe not in the exact same way as you, but if you met them, you would understand each other. Let’s call it the fellowship of suffering.
Remember that so far we have talked about meek people. Moses was meek. Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth. (Num. 12:3) That word means poor, humble and needy. Does that sound familiar? In his poor, needy mental state, he had a conversation with God, started by God. The Lord approached him and said He wanted to use Moses. Yes. A depressed person is no challenge to God. In fact, He prefers crushed people. They are easy to work with. You and Moses might have been friends if you lived in the same era.
Jesus was meek also. Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. (Matthew 11:28-29 AV) Meek for Him meant he was gentle and mild. But he was also lowly in heart. Lowly in Greek means brought low with grief, depressed.
What? Jesus was depressed? He was God, and He was depressed! If you consider all he went through, you know why. His point in mentioning it is in verse 28. Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. He identifies with you. He had low points in His life. But he made it through. We have the advantage, because we can see His life, beginning to end, and we know the purpose for His suffering. In our own lives, we only see right now, and we don’t see the purpose.
How did Jesus make it through His depressing times? He looked ahead. He thought past what he was going through. He knew the future looked better. Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Heb. 12:2)
Can you do that? Can you look down the pike and see better days? Until then, capture this: For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. (Heb. 4:15-16)
If looking forward doesn’t help, look up. You’re in good company. Jesus understands, and He has the power to help you.
And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross. (Phil. 2:8) He made it through the worst thing that can happen to a person. Put yourself in His hands. He can help you make it through far lesser things.
Silver Goblets are the Best
Can we all agree that we, as Christians, are vessels for the Master’s use? Some of us are precious fine china, some are single-use Dixie cups, some are durable Tupperware cups. I would like to address the silver goblets here. They can be used ceremoniously and have a practical place in the Kingdom of God. I’m calling a meek person (who is poor in spirit and emotionally needy) a silver goblet. Work with me here.
My dad used to own a brass foundry. Part of his business involved making machine parts from metals. With huge furnaces and big round pots, he melted down the metal and poured the red-hot liquid into a mold. On the top of the red, melted liquid, scum would form. It had to be skimmed off. It was the product waste, or dross. If you ever go to a foundry and watch the process, know that God is watching it with you and has a lesson: Take away the dross from the silver, and there shall come forth a vessel for the finer. (Proverbs 25:4)
Back to our silver goblets… and you might be one yourself—of melancholy nature who frequently gets down in the dumps, unable to rise up. That “down in the dumps” is the dross that needs to be skimmed off from a perfectly useful piece of silver in the Father’s hands.
You’re not useless, as you might feel sometimes. In fact, your self-deprecation, if tweaked, puts you right where God can use you.
Moses was like that. When God appeared to him from the burning bush in Exodus 3 and explained how He, God, was going to use Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, Moses’ response wasn’t, “Wow, I can hardly wait.” It was, “I am not eloquent… but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue.” (Ex. 4:10) Moses did not think highly of himself. Even after God explained further that He made Moses like that, Moses still didn’t feel adequate. But we know the rest of the story, and God did use him, and God often spoke with Moses as a friend. (Ex. 33:11) What was it about Moses that God really liked? It was his meekness. Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth. (Num. 12:3) It means poor, humble and needy. People like that will turn to God for strength. They will depend on Him, and remember, while our parents raised us to be independent, God is raising us to be dependent.
Jesus was also meek: Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. (Mat 11:29) He asks us to be meek, too. Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; (Col. 3:12)
For some people—our silver goblets—being meek is just who they are. And maybe that’s you. You’re not flamboyant or the life of the party. You are more inward, and you brood easily. You are introspective and easily see faults in yourself and others. Amidst all of that, there is some dross that needs to be skimmed off. Don’t let the negative thoughts overpower you and render you useless. Say, “Yes God. Whatever you want me to do, even though I don’t feel adequate, I’ll do it.” Then find your strength in this promise: For it is God which worked in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure. (Phil. 2:13) Your weakness can be your strength in God’s hands (2 Cor. 12:10)
Rise to the Occasion
Have you ever cupped a tiny scared, shaking animal in your hand? After you’ve held it awhile, it calms down, stops shaking, closes its eyes and falls asleep. It goes from terrified to trusting in minutes. For you, it’s a tender moment that brings out a kind of paternal instinct. This ball of fluff or feathers becomes your little guy, and you realize instantly that you are protecting it from a cruel world that it might not survive in.
What is it about this little creature that brings out the gentle, defending side of you? Helplessness. That’s what it is. You know what could become of this animal if not for you.
And the point today is, if you feel like a tiny scared, shaking creature, look up to God. He loves to hold people like you in His hands and comfort them. He has a soft spot for meek and contrite people. In fact, He prefers them. The LORD lifteth up the meek (Psalms 147:6a ) But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. (1 Peter 3:4)
The word meek means poor, humble, needy, crushed and contrite. That sounds like a mild person to me. It describes Jesus Himself. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. Mat 11:29 Did you catch that? You can find rest for your troubled soul if you are meek and lowly in heart. Maybe your temperament, by nature, is quiet, low-grade depressed, shy and scared. If so, you probably tend to compare yourself with bolder people and envy them. But you’re actually in good company. Moses was like you. You will love reminding yourself about him from reading Exodus 3 and 4.
God had a plan to deliver the Israelites from Egyptian slavery. He chose Moses to be His spokesman and leader. In Exodus 3, God gets Moses’ attention and lays out His entire plan of delivering the Israelites by using him. In Exodus 4:10, Moses explains O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue.
So, why did God choose him? Why didn’t God choose an outgoing person with a booming voice? After all, they didn’t have microphones back then.
God doesn’t think like we do. There’s something about weakness that works for Him. And the LORD said unto him, Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD? Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say. (Exodus 4:11-12) Part of Moses’ appeal in God’s eyes was that he was meek. Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth. Num. 12:3 If you read Numbers 12, you find the context of this statement. Aaron and Miriam decided that they were just as good and capable of leading people as Moses was. But God defended Moses, and that’s when He inserted the fact that Moses was meek. If meekness is weakness in men’s eyes, it’s moldable putty in God’s eyes.
So rise up. No more excuses. Ask God what He wants you to accomplish through you, and don’t say you can’t do it. He doesn’t accept no for an answer. He will be with you and show you how to accomplish whatever it is.
Sparky People
Is self ambition okay? Or is that even something to consider? I remember the three months I spent as a summer missionary in England years ago and the conversation I had with a guy at one of the churches we were helping. He felt compelled to explain what he thought was wrong with American Christians. We are too ambitious, and God doesn’t like that. We’re always planning what we are going to do and how we are going to do it. We should wait on the Lord. Radical. That’s what I thought about him.
If I didn’t have ambition, I don’t think I could get out of bed in the morning. But in one sense I see his point… every now and then. Because most of the time, I’m thinking and planning and dreaming and doing.
But read these verses with me and tell me what you think in the context of self-ambition: Who is among you that feareth the LORD, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the LORD, and stay upon his God. (11) Behold, all ye that kindle a fire, that compass yourselves about with sparks: walk in the light of your fire, and in the sparks that ye have kindled. This shall ye have of mine hand; ye shall lie down in sorrow. Isa 50:10-11 Think on that!
In these verses, God is talking about what I call sparky people. They make stuff happen, and here, it’s not a good thing. That’s because in this context, the people are paving their own way, making their own mark, finding their own solutions—apart from God.
It reminds me of this verse: Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the LORD our God. Psa 20:7
Those who don’t know the Lord, of course are all about self-ambition, because God’s will and God’s path aren’t even in their thoughts. But many who don’t know the Lord accomplish great things through their ambition. Some develop drugs to cure cancer. Some find solutions through technology. Some engineer great inventions. What they dream and do can be magnificent. So, is there anything wrong with that?
To that, I would say that God gave some people tremendous talents and abilities to accomplish wonderful things, but not in a vacuum. Remember that in Him we live and move and have our being (Acts 17:28). And to the Israelites in Deuteronomy, He said: Who fed thee in the wilderness with manna, which thy fathers knew not, that he might humble thee, and that he might prove thee, to do thee good at thy latter end; And thou say in thine heart, My power and the might of mine hand hath gotten me this wealth. But thou shalt remember the LORD thy God: for it is he that giveth thee power to get wealth…(Deut. 8:17-18a)
The Israelites sometimes served as examples of what happens when we go off on our own trails. But they aren’t alone. I sometimes do that, too. I can ride off on my own ideas and not consult God.
Isa 30:15-16 For thus saith the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength: and ye would not. (16) But ye said, No; for we will flee upon horses; therefore shall ye flee: and, We will ride upon the swift; therefore shall they that pursue you be swift.
The lesson is to humble myself before God. Submit to His will. Acknowledge Him and He shall direct my paths (Prov. 3:5-6) Do it at the beginning of the day before I plow ahead. This whole idea of submitting and humbling myself… that’s the topic for this week. Stay tuned. But for now, what do you think of self-ambition?
Be a Channel of Blessing
We know that if not for God’s lovingkindnesses, we would be miserable, hopeless people. He causes the sun to rise and shine on us each day, and provides sanity in many forms. Today is Friday, and we’ve been looking at God’s lovingkindnesses all week. Hopefully you’ve kept your eyes open for them. A parking space opens up in the right place at the right time, you find something you’ve been missing, a friend calls to chat unexpectedly, a child says “I love you,” an opportunity opens up, you discover something awesome…. Don’t miss it. God is behind that. Don’t call it chance. We think we’re so independent, but instead In him we live, and move, and have our being (Acts 17:28).
So each day, you can pray like David did: Withhold not thou thy tender mercies from me, O LORD: let thy lovingkindness and thy truth continually preserve me. (Ps. 40:11)
Yesterday we realized that God shows lovingkindnesses because He loves us. Those actions showing His loving favor are the visible proof that He loves us.
Now, aren’t we supposed to be growing in Him and becoming more like Him? Isn’t godliness our goal? Let’s make the jump here. If God loves us by showing us kindness, shouldn’t we be vessels of that kindness in others’ lives? Um hmm. If you look at the lovingkindnesses you received throughout the past week, didn’t some of them come through someone else? That person was probably unaware that God used them. That’s okay. God turns hearts whatever way He wants for the outcome He desires (See Prov. 21:1).
But here’s a prayer for you, going forward. “Lord, make me a blessing today to someone else.” If you know you can encourage someone else, then make that a goal in your journey to godliness. I know the price of stamps keeps going up, and you have a Facebook account, but why not mail an encouraging note to someone? If you see something that reminds you of someone, perhaps you could buy that for them. If you know a lonely single, figure out when you can open up a piece of your schedule and do something with that person.
People are so discouraged and downtrodden. I know it for a fact. They won’t tell you, but on this blog, the article “Conquer Depression” off to the right is opened by someone nearly every day. Let’s be in the business of partnering with God to show lovingkindnesses to others.
Expect the Unexpected
If you’ve followed this blog for the past week, by now you have ventured to ask for God’s lovingkindnesses, and you’ve experienced them. You may, in fact, have noticed that God was showing you His loving favor all along, you just didn’t recognize it. You’ve heard from a long-lost friend, or someone unexpectedly told you they loved you, and it touched you because you know God put it in their heart. Maybe He helped you find something that was lost. You know what your lovingkindnesses were.
Now, why does God show lovingkindness—besides the fact that He promised He would? It’s because God is love, and love gives. His lovingkindnesses are His acts of love. When you think of how big, awesome and unfathomable God is, and God is love, how big, awesome and unfathomable must be His love. And it is. Remember, He so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. So it shouldn’t surprise us when we see Him act with love in our life and in the lives of those around us—saved and unsaved. God does not reserve His love for those who love and accept him. He causes the sun to rise on the good and the evil (Matt 5:45).
But those who know God through Jesus Christ know who to praise for those lovingkindnesses. It causes us to glorify Him. When we recognize His acts of love, it revives us and makes us want to know and serve Him more. Only we will say Because thy lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise thee. (Ps. 63:3) And we will be bold and ask God Quicken (enliven) me after thy lovingkindness; so shall I keep the testimony of thy mouth. (Ps. 119:88)
So, remember that His lovingkindnesses are his acts of love that go along with His words of love that we find in the Bible. In fact, here are some of His words of love: Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee. (Jer. 31:3) It’s His acts of love and His words of love that keep us from falling apart—or we would all be depressed all of the time, because we’d have no hope.
Now that we know what’s up, we can identify with this prayer of David: Withhold not thou thy tender mercies from me, O LORD: let thy lovingkindness and thy truth continually preserve me. (Ps. 40:11) That’s God’s acts of love and His words of love. He loves us in deed and in truth.
Can you guess where I’m going with this idea tomorrow?
Have Confidence in God's Lovingkindness
If you know Jesus Christ as your personal savior—you’ve recognized you’re a sinner and accepted and received Christ as God’s saving answer for you—then you know God as your Father. Continue to learn what He is like. The fact that you even know Him as Father is credit to His lovingkindness. The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee. (Jer. 31:3)
Not only does he draw you with lovingkindness, He keeps you with lovingkindness. Withhold not thou thy tender mercies from me, O LORD: let thy lovingkindness and thy truth continually preserve me. (Ps. 40:11)
Yesterday we confessed that sometimes we don’t feel like we deserve God’s loving favor, so we don’t dare expect Him to show it to us. If that’s you today, and you feel like dog meat, be glad that God’s lovingkindness doesn’t depend on how you feel. Just muster enough strength to turn to Him. Following are three starter prayers. Pick one and come to God with it, beginning by repeating the verse to God inserting “me” where it applies:
- Shew thy marvellous lovingkindness, O thou that savest by thy right hand them which put their trust in thee from those that rise up against them. Psalms 17:7
- Remember, O LORD, thy tender mercies and thy lovingkindnesses; for they have been ever of old. Psalms 25:6
- continue thy lovingkindness unto them that know thee; and thy righteousness to the upright in heart. Psalms 36:10
Here’s the confidence we can have. If we ask anything according to God’s will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears what we ask for, we know we have received what we asked for. (1 John 5:14-15) Understand that if you pray for lovingkindness, that is according to His will. How do you know that? Because His word says He’s a God of lovingkindness. Just pray and ask God to be who He said He is. So, you can know you will receive kindness from God. And we all need kindness. I know, we expect harshness and anger. I don’t know why that is. But be watching today for a breath of fresh air from God.